Both Sides of the Moon
by MakaMaka
Summary: Persona 2. Worst than death: forgotten. But even then her soul remembers and those transient memories become eternal once more. Snippets from Maya Amano's life on both sides: Innocent Sin and Eternal Punishment.


AN: Written for my love of Persona 2! Here's to the greatest silent protagonist: Maya Amano! There's TatsuyaxMaya and KatsuyaxMaya in this one. Written in snippets.

Companion piece to Lush Memories for Lisa Silverman.

Written while listening to various arrangements of Maya's Theme: Maya's Theme - Sad - PSP arrange, Maya's Theme - Persona 3 arrange, Maya's Theme - Atsushi Kitajoh rearrangement.

* * *

1.

"I'll become a reporter that can show everyone their dreams…" eight year old Maya promises, holding her stuffed bunny charm closely as she watches her father's retreating back.

She turns back towards the Alaya Shrine offering box and wipes at the tears trickling down her cheeks. She knows that it's her father's job to report stories but every time he leaves she can't help but cry in loneliness. This time is different however. This time she cries in fear as her father leaves to report a war.

Silently, she clasps her hands in prayer.

"Please come back safely…"

2.

"Poor thing, she's just a child."

"The mother–"

"The daughter's still so young…"

"His wife–"

"Irresponsible."

"Reckless."

Eight year old Maya ignores the whispers surrounding her and stares at the object in her hand.

She made Mr. Bunbun as a charm to protect him. She had spent hours sewing the bunny yet on the day he left he refused to take it with him.

Her face is wet she realizes and she brings the sleeve of her black dress up to wipe at the tears.

"If I cry Mr. Bunbun will laugh… right dad?"

3.

Her mother burns all of her father's articles after the funeral.

Maya manages to save one but she can't bring herself to look at it much less read it. Instead she keeps it safely pressed in a book a poems her father once bought her.

4.

She has no idea what to how to answer the teacher's question.

"What do you want to be when you grow up?"

5.

Five years after her father's death, thirteen year old Maya Amano is reorganizing her shelves when a book falls out. It flips to a page where a sheaf of folded paper is firmly pressed.

Curious, she reaches over and removes the paper. It's a book a poems she can't remember ever reading. Unfolding the piece of paper from the book her heart stops as she recognizes the title on the page.

It's a war article by Masataka Amano.

6.

"I'm back…" Maya murmurs as she steps up the last step to the Alaya Shrine.

The shrine is as she remembers it five years ago and the thought brings a smile to her face, helping her remember and confirm her dream.

Approaching the offering box she clasps her hands in prayer and repeats the promise she made all those years ago. "I'll become a reporter that can show everyone their dreams."

"Who's that?" a voice asks behind her.

Turning to face the newcomers she allows an easy smile to slip onto her face.

"Oh wow, what cute little justice defenders! Ciaaao!"

7.

Maya winces at the children's tears. She really is sorry she didn't tell them sooner. It had been so much fun playing with them she simply forgot to tell them that she would be moving away at the end of summer.

Moving to comfort the crying girl behind the Pink Azas mask she freezes when the girl declares something that leaves Maya feeling cold.

"If we lock Big Sis in the shrine until tomorrow, she won't be able to go!"

8.

It's hot! It's hot; it's so hot it burnsitburnsitburns-

"Tatsuya-kun!?" she cries out to the boy outside the shrine.

The pained scream of a child fills her ears and horror for the boy outside fills her. "TATSUYA-KUN!?"

A warm and gentle sensation spreads throughout her chest in answer to the fear and suddenly she's so tired. Her vision fades as the figure of a woman with wings appears before her and the world is enveloped in darkness.

9.

The moment she opens her eyes she is greeted by her mother's tears and before she knows it she is whisked out of Sumaru City as her mother promises her they will leave their pasts behind and forget the pain.

10.

Finishing university with a degree in journalism, Maya is confused by the mixed feelings she has about taking the job opening at a magazine called Coolest in Sumaru City. She's happy, sad, confused, and angry all at once.

"Ma-ya, are you alright?" her roommate Ulala asks when she notices Maya staring off into space.

"I'm fine!" she grins, pushing the feeling away.

"Okay." Ulala drops the subject easily and turns back to the drama on TV.

11.

"Have you heard of the JOKER game?" Maya asks her photographer partner, Yukino Mayuzumi.

Yukino looks up from her camera and raises a brow. "That game that supposed to grant your wishes, right?"

"Yes!" Maya exclaims excitedly. "So what do you think?"

"Well," Yukino says as she takes another test picture. "If you're interested in that rumor you should ask some teenagers. They're always following trends like that."

"Is that so…" Maya mumbles. Maybe she should try looking into a high school for information.

She blinks when a flash of light momentarily blinds her. She gasps and turns to her partner who is already running away laughing.

"Get back here Yukki!"

12.

That Tatsuya Suou boy makes Maya want to cry. She holds it back though but her mind is working furiously to analyze the situation. She bites back her distress when she notices how the Mishina boy and Silverman girl is staring at her.

It makes her want to cry but instead she does what she does best and smiles.

13.

She finds herself staring at Tatsuya when he's not aware of it. The way he rarely smiles, the way his brow furrows when they discuss their next course of action, the way he flips his zippo lighter out when he thinks, the way he - dear goodness - moves as he expertly takes down demons; she notices it all whether she wants to or not and it always manages to make her chest to stir uncomfortably. Even now when he's caught in an argument between Lisa and Eikichi she can't take her eyes off him.

She flushes as she realizes she's mooning over a high schooler. How inappropriate! How scandalous, how- how… How what?

14.

She's terrified of the fire but she's strangely grateful when Tatsuya backs down and lets her face her fears at the Aerospace Museum.

15.

She can't remember what happened after the blimp crashed. It's all a blur and there are black spots in her memories between the crash and waking up. She's angry and confused, and the feelings escalate as she tracks down her team into this mountain that continues to bring up memories she's long forgotten – _so that's what happened, that's why her body is covered in burns_.

This fake wearing her face and threatening her friends certainly isn't helping her mood improve either.

She doesn't know what she's doing as she jumps between Tatsuya and the fake copy of her but she recognizes the feeling within her chest as rage.

"You're not me." She firmly states as she glares at her shadow.

The response she gets is a cruel smile that only succeeds in angering her further.

16.

Her heart is heavy when Yukino decides to leave and join her old high school friends in battling the Last Battalion.

But it's better this way, she thinks as she accepts the flower Jun offers her with a bright smile.

17.

Xibalba succeeds in giving her a migraine with the barrage of memories and traps that constantly assaults their little team of persona-users at every turn. What a horrible place, she thinks.

However, she is grateful for the comfort the children offer her as the particularly nasty memory of the day her father left leaves her in tears.

18.

It's a strange experience dying.

The hole in her chest continues to pour out blood despite the ferocity in which Lisa is casting healing spells on her. She wants to tell the crying Lisa and Jun to stop; she wants to reassure the screaming Eikichi that everything will be alright, but it's hopeless. She instead tells them to forget about her with what little strength she has left.

The children refuse and instead plead for her to stay with them through their tears. She manages a weak smile and pulls out Mr. Bunbun telling them not to cry as she does so.

The last thing she recognizes before her eyes close one last time is Tatsuya's anguished face breaking her heart.

19.

It… would be better for them to forget… Rather than remember and be held back by the pain… of losing someone close… Right?

Philemon agrees…

* * *

1.

Thirteen year old Maya leaves the Alaya Shrine feeling oddly disappointed.

She can't help but feel as if something should have happened when she was praying for her future dreams. Only nothing happens and she is left with an odd sense of emptiness.

2.

Why does everything feel so wrong? She often asks herself this question only to come up empty handed and frustrated.

"Come on Maya!" her photographer partner, Yukino Mayuzumi, calls for her to hurry out of the train station.

Running to keep up with her partner Maya can't stop and finds herself sprawled on the ground, the contents of her bag scattering the ground, as she bumps into someone.

"I'm so sorry!" she cries out and is hit with an odd sense of nostalgia when she finds herself staring into deep brown eyes that bring forth a strange image of warm fire and red. "Have we… met before?" she asks before she can stop herself.

Why does this feel so right?

3.

She can't get her mind off that mysterious boy from the train station no matter how hard she tries.

Everywhere she looks, she feels like she will see him again… Oh look at her mooning over a teenager!

A heavy sigh escapes her lips and Katsuya looks over in worry. "Is everything alright Ms. Amano?"

"Yes! Yes, of course it is!" she assures the detective and struggles vainly to push the mysterious boy out of her head.

4.

It's familiar being with Katsuya.

It's not the same feeling as with the boy from the train – not the same as Tatsuya, never the same as Tatsuya – but it's a nice feeling nonetheless.

Maya giggles at the irritation on his face as Ulala and Baofu argue.

5.

Elly lets out a cry of distress when a pool dredges up the memory of a high school promise she once made.

Mt. Iwato… This place brings a bitter taste to Maya's mouth despite never being here before.

She grimaces at the memories she never remembers the various pools within the mountain show her and bites back a wince as Tatsuya explains the memories and his "sins".

These memories are painful yet happy all at once and only succeed in confusing her further as Tatsuya is now both painful and happy to look at, painful and happy to think about.

But the pain doesn't stop the fluttering of her chest when she is hit with emotions she doesn't mind "remembering".

6.

When they're alone, Maya has no idea what to say to Tatsuya.

What can you say to someone who is bearing so much pain alone?

7.

Shadows are a part of who you are.

She stares at the smirking faces of the shadows of her and Baofu with this thought in mind.

This bitter, resentful thing was a part of her and as she looks up to the hanging unconscious Lisa she accepts this fact and pulls out her pistols.

8.

Maya brings a hand to the phantom pain in her chest and stares at the dispersing darkness that was Nyarlathotep.

They have defeated him. They have defeated the Crawling Chaos!

A rush of elation fills her as the phantom pain in her chest fades and she knows that this is it; it's finally over.

"It's finally over…" Ulala breathes, summing up Maya's exact thoughts.

"No… There's still one more thing…" Tatsuya says and Maya's world comes crashing down.

9.

"Take me with you!" she begs him, tears streaming down her face, but by now she doesn't care if Mr. Bunbun laughs at her.

"We are connected by this ocean… We will meet again." He tells her, his voice pinched with pain.

She shakes her head in denial as the tears continue to flow. He can't leave. He can't, not now. Not when she's finally remembered him! It's too cruel, too painful. Tatsuya wouldn't…

He turns to her and stares at her with a pained expression. Bringing her closer, he presses a kiss onto her lips and she grasps at his jacket, not caring that everyone is watching.

Suddenly he pulls back and stares at her with anguished eyes. "I'm sorry Maya…"

She barely has time to register the pain in her stomach before the world fades to black.

Tatsuya, you cruel, cruel person…

10.

Maya stares into space as she waits for the cross walk to turn green and let her pass.

Weeks have passed and Maya feels that maybe, just maybe she can move on.

Looking ahead as the light turns green her eyes widen when she sees the familiar red motorcycle suit of Tatsuya's. Her breathing hitches – what should she do what should she…

Closing her eyes Maya manages to let go of the breath she hadn't realized she held and with a smile she crosses the road.

Turning back once she reached the other side she smiles as a weight is lifted from her chest as she watches the traffic light turn green and Tatsuya drives away. He's Tatsuya… but he's not her Tatsuya…

Now, she can move on.

11.

Five years pass and Maya continues to write. She loves to chase after stories and bring the truth to public eye.

Today Maya finds herself sitting in a coffee shop and staring at her note cards as she waits for the police detective in a recent homicide case. She's going over her questions when the chair from across her is pulled out.

"Hello Ms. Amano." A person greets her as they seat themselves in the seat across from her.

Maya looks up with a smile as she internally wonders about this person's manners and her smile freezes in place, leaving her insides rather cold as her mind stops working.

"Hello Katsuya."

12.

When did this become a habit Maya wonders.

Even after the homicide cases are finished and the truth revealed to the public through her articles, they continue to meet up with one another for lunch and coffee.

Katsuya sips at his coffee and she tilts her head to the side, observing the action. He always speaks of Tatsuya at these meetings, knowing she is curious of his status, but today she wants to hear something different.

"Enough about your brother; tell me about yourself Katsuya."

13.

It was meant to be an innocent reunion between friends. Baofu and Ulala had been there and even Elly, Yukino and Kei, but somehow between the drinks and games emotions escalated.

Maya presses her lips to Katsuya's fervently, clutching the lapel of his jacket as he returns the kisses with equal ferocity.

She can taste his smokes mingling with the alcohol and the flavor of her favorite lip balm.

Both are frantic and needy and neither stops to question what they are doing as the night goes on.

14.

Katsuya is ready to bolt in shame the morning after but Maya throws an arm around him and pressing her face into his chest pleads. "Stay."

After a moment's hesitation he wraps an arm around her waist.

After the showers and both are dressed they both agree it was an accident.

15.

But the accidents keep happening. First because of the drinks and then even without the drinks.

Again and again and again they repeat the same dance that leads to the same outcome.

It's no longer an accident.

16.

Somehow the same steps taken over and over again leads to this moment on the beach.

They're both dressed in white and surrounded by friends and family and even Katsuya's brother – Tatsuya, his name is Tatsuya – is there.

"Kiss! Kiss! KISS!" Ulala shrieks.

Blushing, Katsuya stares into her eyes and leans down to kiss the bride. As he moves to pull away Maya tosses the bouquet and wraps her arms around him, pulling him in for more.

"Ooh YEAH!" Ulala whistles enthusiastically.

17.

Maya smiles as Katsuya wraps his arms around her bulging stomach and presses a kiss onto her neck.

Despite the pain and tears it took to reach where she is now, Maya is happy with the way everything has played out.

The world is cruel, but it is not heartless.

Blinking as something golden catches her eyes Maya tugs at her husband's hand, demanding his attention.

Katsuya turns away from her neck and rests his chin onto her shoulder. He too blinks and a soft smile spreads across his face as sees what caught his wife's attention.

A golden butterfly fluttering softly, leaving behind it a shimmering gold trail of memories.

* * *

AN: I just love, love Maya and her story. It's so tragic yet hopeful. She's easily my favorite protagonist. Anyway, this was much longer than Lush Memories so I had a hard time deciding whether to split it in two for IS and EP or keep it all together. In the end I decided to write it like Lush Memories and keep it as one.

As always, leave a review and tell me what you think.


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